Healing and a Wimpy Moses?

I have been working on my obedience with God. Especially when it comes to healing. Yesterday, during SOE prayer, he showed me a picture of Elijah laying on top of the sick boy and breathing into him and then showed me Jamie. She has been sick for the last couple days, really sick. So I kinda chuckled. Did God really want me to go lay on top of her and breath into her? So I asked God to speak to me clearly cause that is just weird. He asked me, "Do you not think that I can use you to heal her? How much longer are you going to let her suffer and not go pray for her?" That hit so hard. I prayed for a min more in the Spirit. I said okay God, I will go. Boldly and with out hesitation. I left right then and there in the middle of prayer and headed there. Turns out that all three girls were sick and I prayed for them each and it was amazing. Two of them ended up coming to class that day afterward. On my way home God showed me that even in acting in obedience that I must act with persistence. The prayer wasn't a quick one at all and I pushed in faith for healing. Just like Elijah, it wasn't till the third time praying for the kid that he laid upon him and breathed into him that he was healed. I wont just be obedient, but I will be persistent in my obedience with faith.

I'm working on a sermon and have been reading about the story of Moses. I can't count the amount of times that I have heard, read or watched a movie on the story of Moses. So my initial thought, when God told me to read it, was the fact that I already know the story, but as I have been reading it God has been faithful to show me the story in a whole different way. I have always put moses up on a pedestal growing up. But as I have been reading I realized that he was just like us. God spoke to Moses, through a burning bush, and told him what he was called to do. Several times Moses said why me, ask for someone else to do it and or said there was no way he could do it. My thought was, what a wimpy Moses!!! Even after God showed him what he could do with the staff he still was a wimp. He was human like us, but my desire is that when God calls me I wont act that way but I will step out in Faith and do what he has called me to do. I don't want to pull a Moses, in that instance, but he ended up being a great leader and doing what the Lord has called him to do. I do still admire him for other great things.

 Lord let me go with out hesitation and boldly doing your work. 

Directions and Movies...

I have been trying to figure out in which direction I want my blog to go... Should seem simple, and I think I figured it out, then I realize that I haven't lol I know what I want to relate to you all: My love and relationship with my Lord. All else isn't as important lol but still... it should be a fun read for you all...

I've been a busy little bee filming and now editing on our movie for Oscar Night. What is it you ask? Several teams create 15 min long films for all ages. They get voted on and we get to see who wins the Oscar awards. It is a night for others to join as well. A very formal thing. Pretty excited about it!! This year is my first year joining. An absolute stretch for me, but I loved every min of it.

Some of our crew after filming for 16 straight hours ;)

We look a little raggity ha 

COME SEE OUR FILM!!!

p.s. I got asked... and I said yes ;)

God's Promise

Went to see Ash after class to see what needed to be done today and she was having fun and planning wedding stuff. For no reason but fun. After 3 pictures passed I got hit hard and couldn't even look at the pictures. I couldn't even be in the room and had to leave. My mind was instantly flooded with all the memories of Darin and I planning our wedding and all the ideas and pictures that we would pick out to for our wedding. I started to get frustrated before I got sad. Because I thought I had dealt with all the pain associated with that and how can some simple pictures effect me in such a way.  Then my mind was flooded with memories of the night I realized I couldn't marry Darin. I had told him before we even had a real strong interest that I need a man who puts God first in their lives and puts Him as their center point in everything they do. After many talks about God he said he believed that very thing. But a long while passed, we were planning our wedding now and late one night, Darin told me that he had hidden how he really felt about God the whole time, that he was afraid to lose me so he hid it from me, he thought his love would be enough to overlook my over all deal breaker. After explaining in every way possible how I felt and what I needed, Gods love, His place in our lives, what we were born for and that no matter how much I was to love him or our kids I would still love God more cause he would have given them to me... He still didn't agree. I knew that night I couldn't marry Darin. I again was brought to the memory of that night with me on the phone with my mom, after talking with Darin, standing in the street bawling to her. Telling her that idk how I could do this all again. Cause I never knew how I made it out of the last engagement that didn't turn out. I kept telling her that I couldn't do this again, that I didn't understand why this had to happen and I have to do this all again. At that moment I was filled with more fear and hurt then ever before. 

This was going through my mind as I was driving home from class. After that last memory had passed I stopped myself. I realized that the devil was tempting me with these thoughts and memories. To wallow in sadness and anger cause what I wanted didn't turn out and the fact that I even had to deal with any of it. And I began to think about it more, God saved me that day. Can you imagine if I married him; how unhappy I would be? God knew Darin's true heart and reviled it to me that day. God had my back and knew what I really wanted and wasn't going to let me settle for anything less than great. Now Darin is a great guy, but not the one for me. It was a good relationship, don't get me wrong, but God knew that it wasn't going to be everything that I truly wanted. That day was such a hard day and even everything after that has been equally as hard. I chose God's path for my life and not my own. That doesn't mean that it was easy and that doesn't mean every once and a while something like this wont pop up and bring back memories that hurt, but that's why God is here. So that I can lean on Him. I know that I am free from pain and hurt from everything that is associated with him. I can tell you that I made it through it all okay and stronger than ever. Because God was my anchor and my joy. He is my love and everything I need. Because I chose God's path for me, God protected me and helped me through it all. It still amazes me, like today, what God has done for me and what he was doing for me when I didn't even realize it. All I knew at the time was that I was to follow what God wanted for me. He gave me a promise that day, that if I chose Him and His path for my life He will bless me with a man far better and more amazing then I could imagine. This is just one promise that I hold tight to my heart on what God has planned for my life. God will not fail on one word of his promises. (1 Kings 8:56-61)

Treasures in Life

Sick, yet again, and home reflecting on my last couple weeks. Our Conference went far more better than I could have ever imagined. God blessed us all and I am so thankful for everyone that helped out and I will be putting up pictures soon :)

SOE, now called Advance, is ending soon. I kinda don't want it to end. I love spending that all time praising God, and learning and growing with my close friends. Its been a hard but good year. It will be interesting to see what will happen after we graduate. New things are on its way and some great things will be happening :)

My cousin Zach had his birthday yesterday, despite how I felt I still joined the family and I was so thankful of the time I spent with them. Our family is big; i'm Hispanic so when I say big I mean big. And what is amazing is that we all get along and are all really close. Not many families have that. I am definitely blessed to have each one of them in my life. I will admit we are a little weird though ;)

Told ya, we are weird ;)

Love like an Anchor

Someone once told me that if they loved me, with the amount that they did, it would solve and fix anything that came our way. When the relationship ended they lost all hope, in everything. At first I completely disregarded the whole statement. In my mind that logically doesn't work. There are so many other things that play into a relationship that you can't just depend on that. So I counted his statement as completely faulty. A while has passed and it came to my attention again as we are working on our conference for Define. He slightly had the right idea, but it was being miss placed. Your complete love, hope and trust should be fully placed on God. Things happen in life and if we place our whole heart and love in one person you cant promise that everything will be okay and that something wont happen that tears it apart. Whether it be a job, relationship or material item. Yes, you both can be committed to each other, stay by each others side and do everything to make it work, but we are human and that may not be the path that God has for us. That allows you to have hope differed, which is NOT healthy. Our love first and foremost should be placed in God. Our love and adoration for Him is like our anchor. Hebrew 6:19, "This hope we have as an anchor for the soul, both sure and steadfast..." God created the World, and everything on it. We are only human. If we place our love in God and have him as our anchor no matter what storm may pass, with Him, everything will be okay. That isn't saying that it won't be hard, but you wont have hope differed and end up empty and hopeless. I won't ramble on, but this is just a taste of what we will be talking about at our conference March 30th. Check out the website, come to the event and see even more what I am talking about: http://www.defineconference.com/ 

Family is one thing I hold so dearly to my heart. I am fortunate enough to have such a huge family that I can count on at any moment and that I am so close to. I have to continue to keep myself in check. I tend to busy myself with everything in life and with all the place I serve that I don't save time for family. Along with being so busy recently, I have let myself slack on the sleeping portion, Therefore I am now sick and forced to stay home and sleep ha BUT the amazing thing is that I got to enjoy a great night with my family. I have missed this. 

Today has definitely been a day to reflect on a lot of things; pretty easy to do when you spend a whole day in bed sleeping or just resting. I am so thankful. I don't deserve everything that God gives me, but he continues to bless me. Even in one of my jobs that I can't stand. I made great money, closed with Paul, who is a pleasure to work with, and spent the rest of my evening at a Sherie's Dinner with and old friend till 4 am. I am so thankful to have such a friendship in life and excited to see it grow. Even a fellow little sheep that Matt dropped in my purse decided to hang out ;) 

Die Daily

Writing on here is much like my love for running and working out, it is never the first initial start of it that is hard, but it is the continuing of it.  I love to do it, but sometimes I allow myself to occupy my time with other things and it slips right on by. No bueno. 

Well, in a nut shell... God is amazing and my relationship with him only continues to grow stronger.He has been my rock through everything and I can honestly say that I fully trust him with my life, He is my beloved and my hope and joy.  This last year has been a long and hard journey. I dropped n let go of my life, my desires, my dreams and my loves to follow God and follow His life for me, His desires, His dreams and fell in love with him. It has been hard. I let go of who I was planning on and thought I was going to marry, left a life that I thought made me happy and friendships that I thought were real. I die daily, as it says in 1 Corin 15:31, "I affirm by boasting in you which i have in Jesus our Lord, I die daily." Each day I deny what my flesh desires and choose what God wants for me. It isn't easy and it's a daily thing. As I have put God first in my life, my life has been open to see things through His eyes. I have never been so happy. I know that I am never alone and that I am meant for a purpose. I am a disciple of Christ and a worrier for His Kingdom. Since I have done this, my life has been nothing but amazing. 

Got a new job at a wireless place in Costco, Living in good ol' Nampa, building my Marketing resume rapidly and I mentor High School girls. I am being stretched in so many areas and it only continues to grow me more and more. In the growth I have seen in my passions and dreams is far beyond what I could have thought and it all serves Him. 

I am happy, I'm loved by many and my life full of excitement and Its only going to get better. I couldn't ask for more.

You should join the journey. I promise you that you wont regret it ;)